I went kayaking for the first time this weekend. It was so much fun! I plan to go as often as I can from now on. I have always thought that kayaking would be fun, but before I lost weight, I was afraid I would be too big for the kayak or too out of shape to paddle or to get back in should I capsize. So, I was able to finally go kayaking because (a) I am in better shape and as such paddling was probably easier and the entire experience more enjoyable and (b) honestly, I feel better about myself and I have more confidence in how I look and in my athletic abilities.
Kayaking is just one of several things I have been able to experience since I started to lose weight. I've heard people say that "Life gets bigger when you lose weight," I didn't really get that at first, I thought it sounded kind of condescending, really. But it's been true, at least for me, because I experience more. Here is why: First, I'm smaller so I am more comfortable doing everything from flying in an airplane to riding rides at Disneyland to going to the movies or the theatre to kayaking. Second, I have more energy so I don't excuse myself from going out and doing things. I missed out on so much before just because I was tired and didn't have the energy. Third, I feel better, both physically and emotionally. I already talked about how my migraines have all but vanished, I will get a headache once in a while, but nothing like the debilitating migraines I used to experience. And my headaches now are easy to deal with - water and a Tylonol - and the headache is gone. I hadn't realized how much my migraines were hindering me, I missed a lot because of them. And, maybe it is because I have more energy, but my mood is generally better. I just feel good - and because I feel good, I feel like going out and doing more - I get bored sitting on the couch now. Finally, I am more confident. I don't feel like the "fat" person in the room anymore (and I probably judged myself more harshly than anyone else judged me). I was more insecure than I realized. Because of that confidence, I will do things (like try kayaking) that I did not do before. Life is definitely bigger, I get it now.